stethoscopes, style, & grace: 40 weeks

Obviously I'm a little crazy for posting pictures of myself at 40+ weeks and I'll probably regret this, considering that my face looks like a little puff ball. I actually had decided not to post anything until after the baby came (mostly due to Stephen's encouragement to avoid "all social media" after witnessing my serious frustration at seeing people due after me delivering their babies). But here I am, 40 weeks and 3 days, with no baby yet and starting to go a little stir crazy.

So let's talk about being three days past my due date with an impending move 8 hours away that was supposed to happen two weeks from now (with a four week old baby of course after my delivery at 38 weeks - ha). After said move, we were supposed to travel 10 more hours (although we were probably going to fly) to Stephen's brother's wedding at which I was going to stand in a bridesmaid dress. All this providing that the baby was born at a nice 38 or 39 week mark which would mean the baby was around 5 or 6 weeks when I start residency orientation mid-June.

But here we are, and I have to admit that I didn't mentally prepare myself at all for this...which in retrospect was pretty ignorant since I know from my fairly extensive time rotating in the OB clinic that first-time moms tend to deliver late. Honestly though, I just didn't know how we would handle it if the baby came at all late so I preferred to just plan on him being early, which happens really often with residents and med students anyways because of the stress we induce on ourselves and the ungodly amount of time we spend on our feet.

So I feel...frustrated...bitter...anxious...and most of all, sad. Sad that each day that passes means one less day that I get to spend with our little guy before I start residency and one more day of the anxiety/stress of not being able to plan our big move and this transition in our lives. My mom keeps telling me though that the baby is safe and happy inside of me and while it doesn't change how hard it will be for me to leave him while he's so very new, he becomes more bonded to me each day he spends in the womb.

And some nitty gritty (skip if you don't want 40 weeks prego details). When I first found out we were expecting, I told myself that I would ask to be induced around 38 or 39 weeks if it didn't happen naturally because of the crazy timing with residency starting - I simply just didn't know how we would do it if we delivered on my due date or afterward. However, after a lot more research into natural birth and realizing that induction before 40 weeks wouldn't be best for me or the baby (however convenient, if it worked) I decided to wait until the end to be induced. But the reality is, I didn't think I would go until the end and while I could wait until the end of my 41st week according to my doctor, since the baby isn't that big (although I'm quite sure he's at least a decent size this late in the game) and the pregnancy has been healthy, I told Stephen this weekend that I don't think I can go past Friday because of my current mental/emotional state about everything we have going on...so that is that (please please pray that it happens naturally - I would be eternally grateful). And now for a (not) brief list of the natural induction strategies I've tried (and clearly aren't scientifically based, for the most part, since they have done a whole lot of nothing):

- Red rasberry leaf tea (starting a couple weeks ago, 2-3 strong cups/day)
- Evening primrose oil (2000 mg daily for the last few weeks)
- Fresh basil
- Pineapple
- Walking (as in an hour/day lately of mostly power-walking)
- Squats/plies (30-45 min most days for the last 6 weeks, courtesy of Summer Sanders)
- Lots of "tylenol" and nip stim (see Anna's post)
- A prenatal massage with acupressure on the supposed labor points (sacrum, ankles)
- A pedicure/foot massage
- Meditation (courtesy of Fr. Benedict Groeschel's Joyful Mysteries - whether or not this has helped speed things along, it has helped me feel more at peace).

Moving on...

Dress: Anthropologie

Wedges: Old Navy

This is what I wore Sunday, to my future sister-in-law's shower yesterday. With all my lovely sisters + mom:

We went to mass Saturday night and while I was sitting there I got the sudden inspiration to hike up a small mountain 10 minutes outside of town. There's lots and lots of hills and stairs and more hills so I thought it might finally do the trick (wrong), and I dragged Stephen with me. We may have gotten a few looks as I huffed and puffed at full speed up the mountain at 40+ weeks but I made it (I did have Stephen check my heart rate once - 132). Despite no resulting contractions, it did feel like an accomplishment when I got to the top, and made me grateful for all the exercising I've done throughout the pregnancy.

After the hike:

my sisters told me that I'm smiling with my lips and not my eyes in these pics - probably right
also, hello periorbital edema! courtesy of no sleep, not preeclampsia