On changing my last name...

 Picture taken by my lovely friend Denise

I've always had a little bit of a quasi-feminist edge and when we got married, I didn't take Stephen's last name. I wasn't 100% opposed to changing my name, but I also didn't want to change it right away. My last name is part of my identity, and I guess I needed some time to consider it. Also, I've worked hard for my M.D. and most of my medical school accomplishments are under my maiden name. At first I planned to hyphenate my last name, but the more I thought about it the more cumbersome it seemed (along with the fact that my unique and fairly long last name didn't mesh well with Stephen's traditional Irish name). And as I met more female physicians that kept their maiden name, I became more and more comfortable with just leaving my name as it was.

Stephen's family is pretty traditional so I mentioned it once but didn't talk much otherwise about it to them. It never bothered me when his family would send us mail addressed to us under Stephen's last name, since after all we are married. Sidenote though that I still don't understand why people address couples as Mr. and Mrs. husband's first and last name. Other relatives are very far on the traditional side and probably would have fallen over backwards if I had pushed the issue - I spent my in-law's wedding ceremony seething from my bridesmaid's position on the altar while the Lutheran pastor went on about how marriage is about wives obeying their husbands, serving them, etc. etc....and then was introduced as the pregnant wife at the wedding reception/asked how nursing school was going (the concept of female physicians is still foreign for some)...but I ramble. My family is also pretty traditional, but they know me well enough not to push the issue (yes I can be a little stubborn) although my fairly not-traditional uncle blatantly told me that he felt there was no reason for women not to change their name unless they were planning on a divorce (wow).

And you're probably wondering what Stephen thought of all of it, since his opinion obviously matters most. Sweet Stephen never once said that it bothered him, or really said much either way. He loves me for me, and ultimately he married me for me whether I took his last name or not (and he knew that I might not...actually I'm pretty sure that he thought I never would). But deep down, I can't help but think that he probably did hope/wish that I would eventually change my name...

The factor that pushed me to finally make a decision was when we found out about the baby. I always knew that I didn't want my children to have a different last name then me, or people to wonder if their parents were married because we had two different last names. I've heard of people hyphenating their children's last name, but like I already said, ours would be quite cumbersome. Plus, what if we had a daughter and she wanted to hyphenate her married name (triple last name?)

So last week I marched my pregnant self down to the Social Security office after work and changed my name. I decided that I wanted to keep my last name, but add it as a second middle name. This way I could still hold on to a little piece of my identity over the last 28 years and potentially use my maiden name professionally (although I don't know that I will, since Stephen's is much easier to pronounce). I expected to maybe feel a twinge of regret as I walked out with a piece of paper with my new last name on it, but instead I felt kind of liberated. And when I told Stephen, he didn't say much but his (a little shocked/surprised) smile said enough. He has made enough sacrifices for me (medical school, moving, now residency) that it felt good to something small for him...and ultimately, I did it for myself too.

Sunday adventures + an outfit

Stephen and I spent today exploring ice caves an hour's drive away. It was a cold but beautiful hike in, and when we arrived to the caves it was absolutely breathtaking:

We've loved all the little adventures that we've gotten to do together, and this was special because it is most likely our last one before the babe arrives. I was all up for the hike, but if I'm honest it was a little harder than I anticipated...the bump I'm carrying around made for some never-before-experienced aches and pains on the hike back. But it was worth every step.

And what I wore to mass (linking up with Fine Linen and Purple and Plane Pretty):

Cardi: J. Crew//Dress: Isabella Oliver//Boots: Hunter

Loving this new dress from Isabella Oliver. It'll be on constant rotation through the rest of the pregnancy.

And a side view (although both Stephen and I agree that the bump looks bigger in real life than it does in this picture):

Quick takes: baby showers & registry essentials + 30 weeks

1. I was so happy to discover Tiny Prints because my mom and sisters and I found the most adorable baby shower invites we had ever seen. It was a hard decision, but we ultimately chose these - I love the vintage theme, pretty font, and adorable baby carriage. My mom actually ended up finding napkins and plates that go along with the baby carriage theme :) We were also able to put a little ultrasound picture of the babe on the back.

And these were the runner-up invites (so cute):

Tiny prints also has the sweetest baby announcements (bookmarking for future use!)

2. Speaking of baby showers, I was completely overwhelmed at first with what to put on our registries. Too many options for everything makes knowing what to choose that much more difficult, and since we'll be moving right after the baby is born simplicity is better. I compiled our registries with help from my mom (eight kids has to mean something!), sister-in-law (my nephew is 19 months so she was the perfect person to ask), and some blogger help: you guys gave me some great suggestions, Anne has some great registry essentials lists in this post, Tiny Twig just shared an awesome baby registry post, and this comprehensive list by A Cup of Jo is the best. After a lot of research, here are a few of our baby registry items:

3. Sleep: Co-sleeper, swaddle sacks, noise maker

• Stephen and I knew that we wanted the baby in the room with us for at least the first few months, so a co-sleeper was a must have. Katrina led us to this one and I love the neutral color and polka dots.
• My sister-in-law swears by the Halo sleep sacks as an essential for my nephew to sleep, and since we aren't planning on having any blankets in his crib these are perfect.
• Multiple people have recommended having some sort of noisemaker, and Stephen and I personally always have some sort of white noise in our room but I wouldn't have thought of this for the baby. This little lamb noise maker is cute and portable.

4. Nursing: boppy, breast bottles, Medela double electric pump

• Absolutely everyone has said that the Boppy is an essential for breastfeeding comfortably.
• After doing some reading, a double electric breast pump is a must-have for moms that plan to work after the baby and still breastfeed. We were super lucky to have a mom give us her Medela In Style double electric pump. Even though insurances do cover a breast pump, the lactation consultant at my breastfeeding class told us that a lot of insurances have changed with the new health care plan and no longer will provide a Medela or double electric pump (and I doubt that my student insurance would cover the Medela one we needed). We were so happy to receive this one (and we will of course be getting all new connector parts for it since they technically aren't multi-user pumps).
• The lactation consultant at my class showed us these Medela Calma bottles, which are supposed to mimic breastfeeding for the baby. I'm so glad that I went to the class because I had no idea that we should wait four weeks to start a bottle or that breast-feeding bottles even existed.

5. Travel: diaper dude bag, ergo, umbrella stroller

• Since Stephen will be with the baby more than me, I really thought he needed his own diaper bag, and he informed me that he would need one after he went to his dad's class :) 
• Everyone has recommended the Ergo baby carrier, and the Ergo swaddle carrier is supposed to be great for carrying the baby around the house, etc. if he wants to be held all the time.

6. Baby essentials: Rock n' play sleeper, nosefrida, Sophie the giraffe, muslin swaddlers

• So many people have recommended the Nosefrida, although I still find the concept really weird (Stephen and I watched the video together on how to use it which was kind of entertaining). It comes highly recommended, so I'll take their word for it.
• Multiple people/blogs (including Grace) have sung the praises of Sophie the giraffe as the best teether ever.
• Everyone seems to love the Aden and Adais muslin swaddle blankets (which can also be used as burp cloths, etc.) and I was proud of myself because I actually registered for some before I read all the high reviews.
• I had no idea that there was a difference between a Rock n' Play sleeper and a bouncer, but apparently there is and my nephew would sometimes only sleep in this due to his reflux. It and the bouncer are also supposed to be great to put the baby in while you're showering  (right outside the shower of course) and I honestly always wondered how moms showered when they have a newborn.

7. Just for fun: I couldn't resist the little doctor bib and doctor-in-training scrubs :)

And the weekly baby bump pic:

30 weeks!

Linking up with Jen.

And thank you to Tiny Prints for the lovely baby shower invitations!

One dress, six ways

All I really think I needed in my maternity wardrobe was this Gap dress (ok and maybe some leggings, long jersey tops, and a good pair of maternity jeans). But seriously, I probably could remix this 60 ways with things that I already have in my closet. Also, I would totally wear this not pregnant - I've already gotten multiple queries from non-pregos on where I got this dress.

Six ways I've been wearing it:

1. With a blazer (old, J. Crew)//Hunter's.

2. With a scarf (J. Crew, old)//Boots (Frye)

3. With a cardi (J. Crew)//necklace (J. Crew Factory, old)//wedges (Target, old)

4. With some great accessories - leopard clutch (Madewell)//belt (old, J. Crew)

5. With a blazer (J. Crew)//scarf (old, H&M)

6. With a jean jacket (J. Crew, old)

Linking up with Pleated Poppy/Agi

Med School Q&A: Step 1 boards and Prego interviewing

 Posting this picture again from our volunteer trip to Peru because it's my fav white coat pic

It's been a while since I've linked up with Medical Mondays! If you're new here, I'll be graduating in May with my M.D. (you can read more about my journey to med school here). I decided to do a Q&A post today on two of the most popular reader questions that I've gotten about med school and residency interviewing (I was planning on answering three but two ended up being plenty long for one post!). If you have other questions, feel free to leave a comment or send me an email at stethoscopes.style.grace@gmail.com and I will do this post again in the future.

Question 1: Can you share some advice on how you studied for Step 1 boards?

Well, first of all I'm no expert on studying for boards and I do think that everyone has different study methods that work for them! That being said, it definitely helps to hear how other people studied and if they found it effective. I was fortunate to score above the 90th percentile on my board exams (thanks to studying and prayer!) which is very helpful when it comes to interviewing for residency (although keep in mind that if you don't get the score you want residency programs really do look at the whole picture).

So my advice on Step 1: I did not start doing boards prep questions until March of second year, during my Cardiology unit. I think the best advice for second year is to focus on learning each unit really well rather than starting boards studying early, since your second year courses will prepare you for boards. We took a practice exam during the spring when I hadn't start focused boards studying yet and I scored close to the median for Step 1 without really any boards-focused prep (which I definitely attribute to doing well in my second year courses). I set my goal score at 30 points above that practice exam, which is supposed to be a realistic goal if you plan to spend 4-6 weeks studying. I started my actual Step 1 studying about 5 weeks before I took the exam and studied 8-10 (occasionally more) hours per day, with a few days off (I actually was in a wedding the weekend before I took my boards). Taking a few days off to refresh yourself is definitely important.

So the nitty gritty of how I studied: I structured my studying loosely on The Step 1 Method, which my school promoted. Basically you make a schedule for your study time of how many days you will spend in each area (ie 4 days for biochem, 1 1/2 for genetics, 2 for anatomy, 4 for cardiology, 4 for neurology, etc.) On each study day, you do blocks of 46 questions at a time (UWorld questions seem to be the universal gold standard and are what I used). Set the practice tests on "Tutor" mode which means doing one question at a time and reading the explanation for each question after you do it. After you read the explanation, read the corresponding section in First Aid and annotate any important things that are missing into First Aid (don't go too in-depth on this). At the end of each subject, do the questions that you got wrong over again. I did the prep questions by subject, but it's a good idea to do blocks of random questions the last couple days of studying. I found this method of studying very effective and used a similar method to study for Step 2. I tried to keep exercising (both to stay sane and because I got married in August after I took my boards) so most days I would either go on my elliptical trainer while I watched Pathoma lectures or walk around the neighborhood while I listened to Goljan audio lectures.

Good luck!

Question : I want to have a baby fourth year, but I've been told that it's not a good idea to show up for residency interviews pregnant. What do you think and how did you find interviewing to be while pregnant?

This is a question that I heard a lot of advice on both sides about before I interviewed for residency. I had always felt that I should 'plan' (my husband and I use natural family planning so we have a certain openness about it, although we find our method very effective) the pregnancy so that I would not look pregnant while I was interviewing. My practical self was worried that it could hurt me in the match despite the fact that I did well on boards and received AOA. However, my fears were probably unfounded since I was told (and now believe, though I was skeptical at first) that any program who would rank you lower for being pregnant is not a program that you want to be at anyways. Also, it is much better for the program if you have a baby during fourth year then during intern year. But the bottom line is that I don't think med school should dictate when to start a family.

As far as my experience, I wasn't showing enough to appear pregnant during most of my interviews (esp. with this awesome loose blouse that I wore) and I didn't tell programs that I was expecting (except for one peds emergency physician who asked and was totally supportive). My very last interviews in January I was 22 weeks and showing a little but I didn't find it to be an issue. I wore my regular suit blazer with some black maternity pants and this blouse (I wouldn't suggest wearing a tight black minidress with stilettos like the one other fellow prego on the interview trail was wearing - you don't need to emphasize it more than it shows naturally!).

I will deliver in May so I will have just enough time before I start intern year. Looking at everything now, it would have been nice to deliver earlier in fourth year so that I could have had more time with the baby (we purposefully tried to plan it so I wouldn't be showing for interviews but now I realize that there are more important things). Overall, I've gotten a lot of encouragement and support from residents and physicians who had children in residency and we are just so excited to grow our little family.

Dear baby + lots of bump pics

Rounding out Jen's 7 posts/7 days challenge (yay! I made it!) by finally posting my letters to baby from the last three weeks...

WIWS and thoughts on blogging...

Blazer: J. Crew Factory (this year's version, but the same I think as the older one that I'm wearing)

Lace top: Motherhood (last seen here, when the bump was much smaller!)

Minnie pants: J. Crew

Wedges: Target (old, similar)

We went to mass tonight, so I'm posting my Sunday outfit now...also so I can continue to keep up with Jen's 7 posts/7 days challenge. I'm so glad that I linked up with her challenge (which seemed a nearly impossible feat one week ago) because it's been good for me. I've had lots of posts that I've thought about or rough-drafted and never felt like were good enough to share, but I've realized that I've probably missed out on a lot of semi-decent posts that way. I've also realized that I really want to write more personal posts, like Wednesday's, and more spur-of-the-moment posts, like Thursday's. So even though I can't see myself blogging 7 days in a row again anytime soon, Jen definitely inspired me to post more often and more freely.

Our priest asked how many weeks I have left after mass...which is, um, 10 (or I could be optimistic and say 8, since we'll be full-term then and please baby come a little early). I took it as a sure sign that I'm looking biiiig, or at least much bigger. I've also had a few people come up to me lately and see "Oh, you are expecting!" as opposed to getting fat I guess...it's just funny since I've been thinking everything could tell I was pregnant for months :)

Like I mentioned on Wednesday, I'm getting a little disenchanted with my maternity wardrobe so I'm going to try to mix in more non-maternity pieces. I found this blazer (which I got a couple years ago but apparently is still available from J. Crew Factory here) when I was going through some boxes of clothes and deciding what to donate/sell. I forgot how much I love it...Also a disclaimer that I did not actually wear the wedges outside in our mountains of snow (too cold and too hazardous for the off-balance prego). Instead I wore my Sorel's of course.

29+ weeks and counting!

Happy Saturday night!